Love stuck at age nine.

Nowadays, I shake my head when my twelve year old sister tells me about boys that have asked her out, or boys her younger friends are dating. Rarely do I revisit that part of my childhood; the crushes, 'relationships', 'heartbreaks'. To me, they're nonexistent. In reality, they did exist at one point, I just feel dumb talking about it.
In second or third grade, there was a boy in my class. He was probably one of the nerdiest kids to exist in Bagnall Elementary school. But me, being who I am, has always had a soft spot for 'geeks'. We flirted a lot, or whatever it was that was called flirting back then. You know, cute 'I love you' notes on each other's desks, holding hands, spending all day at school together. For a while, it went unnoticed by the other students, which I was thankful for, because back then I always tried to fit in, but never could, and if they knew I was with that kid, surely I'd never live it down.
I can be unbelievably shallow, especially when I'm nine or ten and in desperate need of friends.
After what felt like a long time, but probably only a week or so, people started catching on. Mainly my best friend, whom made fun of him to me numerous times. When she questioned me about it, I denied it, but did tell her we were 'good friends'. Soon, the boy and I were talking on the phone, and I also started envisioning 'romantic' walks, and even kissing him. I don't know whether its a good or bad thing, but those never happened. Once my best friend was positive about the little 'fling', I stopped talking to him. I might have told him to screw off, but I'm pretty sure I did it in a nice way because we stilled remained friends and I still had feelings for him up until different classes and lunches separated us, and I just stopped caring all together.
Once I switched houses in the beginning of fourth grade, I found myself on the same bus as him. I watched as all the big, bad sixth graders bullied the poor kids around. Mainly I just watched, but a few times I stood up for him, and other times I joined in the fun, which still makes me feel awful to this day. One time, when everyone was being really brutal to him, making fun of how he could never get a girlfriend, I agreed with them. He looked at me, almost like a hurt puppy, and said 'Well I went out with you' and instead of shying away or being embarrassed, I said 'what the fuck are you talking about, thats bullshit!' and I'm pretty positive those were the last words we exchanged. He went to an advanced middle school because of how smart he was, while I continued with the school system I was in. Lately, I've heard he turned into some mall-goth, but I'm sure I wouldn't recognize him if I saw him anyways, so I don't see why I care.
Sometimes I wonder if he remembers me. Not in a sad, pathetic way, but I wonder if he dismissed the whole thing from his life, as well. I just find it hilarious how kids so young can think they know and feel so much about something when they really don't.